erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
