and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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