Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Your shirt... Was in my pants
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize