He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
