So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
