when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
