i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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