Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
