Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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