Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
