Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
