Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
