Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize