That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Randomize
