And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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