stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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