The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Randomize
