he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
