I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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