Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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