Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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