how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
