): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
