my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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