The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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