Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
