i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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