there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I will be naked everywhere
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
