we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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