you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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