Will you blow on my dice?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize