I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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