If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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