whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
