Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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