i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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