Pants 0. Shit 1.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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