I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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