Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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