We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
There r osticjed everywhere
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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