Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
