Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
