you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
