Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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