you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I will pee on everything he values.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
