I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize