glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
