i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I want her autograph on my taint
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize