But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
