waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Randomize
