Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
