i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
