And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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